Undo old strategies

Anger management

This is a good source (link).

Old: 

  • My anger reaction to ‘offenders’ are instinctive & protective (to myself).
  • I lived in a sheltered, privileged, and sick bubble of my mom’s. I was a spoilt kid who did whatever I wanted (treated people like dirt, said whatever I wanted without thinking of its repercussions…) just because I have money.
  • I was entitled for being ‘the haves’.

New: protections in the current world are not through angers. Angry outburst, confrontational are doing damages.

PROTECTIONS ARE:

One. Good People Skills

The outcomes that I sought is I will get protection, defences, armour, inclusion, liked, favoured by the people – especially that I seek for.

Not not within reason – all within reasons – to be the kind of person possessing such a high standard, so that my presence, my inclusion, my contributions is sought after.

The driver to possess this skill are not the actual actions. But again, like budgeting, it is driven by mindset.

> that to have that freedom I sought for, to have that money, I cannot do anything on my own, alone.

I must win people’s hearts, people’s favours, people’s defences as a consequent of it.

Ideally, I must win people’s willingness to put me under their wings, so that I can fly.

> That really is… the way to fly – to have my freedom.

 

  1. Tactical manoeuvres, calm demeanour, smile and voluntary engagement.
  2. Being the person that people want and feel proud to be around with.
  3. Always speak of goodness, don’t confront, don’t retaliate, don’t criticise.
  4. Provide input sandwiched with positives.
  5. Always be the best of myself.
  6. Always have a high standard in conducting myself.
  7. Always win people’s hearts.
  8. Always smile and don’t say too much.
  9. Always deliver great results @ work and @ home.
  10. Be aware of myself 
    • Aware of my strengths
    • Aware of my weaknesses
    • Aware of my position – flexible, moving position – in the situation 
    • >> Keep quiet, keep diplomatic at all times
    • I have no good experience with certain class of people – gold diggers which I despise –
      • Accept the difference, that they are insecure and uncomfortable with themselves
      • Accept that regardless whether they are gold diggers or not, some will do be uncomfortable with their skin, background, etc.
      • >> So, be inclusive, be accepting, be humble, be wanting to build rapport with people – with everyone. 
      • >> make people feel accepted by me.
  11. Be aware of my surroundings
  12. Self regulate: 
  13. LISTEN.
    1. Not to just the words, but what they actually really meant.
    2. And verify carefully!
  14. Voluntary defences from people surrounding me i.e. building relationships every day.
    • Build everyday normal relationships
      • Spend time to build genuine relationships with people.
      • Be trustworthy.
      • Behave with high EQ.
    • Build trust
    • Win support
      • ..
    • understand life, understand people, 
    • know myself, and know my place in the situations i am in.